Roderick Popplestone's Arbitrary Collection

An Introduction to the Noblemen of The Grapes' Club

by Bosie Giddy-Gaylord

Lord Boyling is an outgoing and dashing bibliophile, as well as a collector of penny dreadfuls, burlesque figurines and women. With regard to the latter, most of his conquests are appallingly dreary trollops with “perfect” figures and “pretty” smiles. Currently, two matters occupy Lord Boyling, namely, his meagre creative venture with Lord Ponkleton (see below), and his membership in the highly exclusive Grapes' Club. When he’s not there, though, he’s most often relaxing with an entertaining read at Boyling Manor.

Lord L. T. Ponkleton is very nearly always stalked by the viciously efficient Noel Blunt (as yet the unofficially unauthorised biographer of Lord Ponkleton) and is often spotted threatening him, his legal status and quite often also his condition as a breathing human being. Lord Ponkleton’s main hobbies include his vulgar literary escapades with Lord Boyling (see above), smoking tobacco, and women . He’s an active

member of the fashionable Grapes' Club and his favoured type of female is non-bald, artistic, and sexually laissez-faire. Though, on certain occasions, he has been known for engaging in disreputable liaisons with mature women via the personals.

Lord Jamés, Duke of the County of Newnose, is a wonderfully relaxed, musically inclined, and outright fabulous young Adonis. His passions are of such a diverse nature as to preclude precisely everything save string instruments, breaking wind and women . Naturally, befitting to his natural beauty and splendour, he’s a serious member of Grapes' , but otherwise spends most of his leisure time at any of his many villas in the County of Newnose. I rather fancy, or hope, he doesn’t favour a particular type of woman .

Lord Mottsford, ever the philanderer, divides his time twixt picture shows, playing various board games, and women. As one of the crucial components of Grapes', he spends every moment outside of the Mottsford Estate there, often in the company of the abovementioned noblemen. He prefers women of the temperamental, petite and nubile kind, though a handful of exceptions have been noted, and exercises his libido on a regular basis.