Hello, hello, Bosie Giddy-Gaylord here.

It’s absolutely fabulous to be back at the drawing board again, so to speak. I can’t begin to tell you all how utterly wretched I feel for having left you so shockingly uninformed lately! My deepest apologies, dear readers, but I must confess that I have been otherwise engaged. You see, I have met someone. This marvellous individual outright swept me off my designer loafer-clad feet as I was perusing the shop window of Humphrey & Humphrey’s, looking for a nice scarf to go with my new peacock feather fan. My first impression of this heavenly was not of the visual kind, but of the nasal, as a slight autumn breeze picked up and carried the sweetest perfume on angels’ wings past my nostrils. For a moment, I was completely flabbergasted, but I calmed myself and maintained my fabulous composure and gentlemanly decorum.

I am in love, dear reader, like a little schoolboy who has introduced a string of liquorice twixt his lips for the first time, smearing most of its molten interior juiciness on his chin in sheer delight. It would be outmost pleasure to present this person further, but I fear the influx of rival suitors would deter me from ever shopping at Humphrey & Humphrey’s again.

So, let us proceed to this month’s most fabulous gossip! Alas, this November entry will focus solely upon two of our favourite noblemen: the talented Lord Mottsford and the ever so hairy Lord Jamés, Duke of the County of Newnose. You see, Lord Boyling is currently away on a business trip to the savannah, impregnating the natives and diminishing the population of rhinos, elephants and the mythical great white humpbacked African platypus, while the task of chronicling the escapades of Lord Ponkleton has been monopolised by the constantly complaining and healthily bitter Noel Blunt, as yet unofficially authorised biographer of L.T. Ponkleton. You may find his article in the regular archives.

But I assure you; Lords Mottsford and Jamés are no less interesting, even though we know them to be!

Tenderly,

Bosie Giddy-Gaylord